District of Corruption

My Kind of State of the Union

2007-01-24T23:07:00.000-05:00

My kind of State of Union speech!

Watch more PETA videos at PETATV.com. Naked chicks work.

We're Going to Kill More... Oops, Send More Troops

2007-01-14T13:40:00.000-05:00

Well the fascists have decided to move forward and send more troops into Iraq, despite significant Congressional opposition, and the fact that 67% of Americans oppose the move. It's a terrible consequence of presidential power, and one must wonder how this will hurt the country in unimagined ways.

Worst yet is the blood that's on the hands of Bush and Cheney. Thousands of Americans, and more than one hundred thousand Middle Easterners. There is no shame on Pennsylvania Avenue.

And Dick-head Cheney says, "But you also cannot run a war by committee." Democracy at work, huh? Welcome to the District of Corruption.

Fascism

2007-01-09T09:53:00.000-05:00

Comliments of Dictionary.com, here's the definition:

fas·cism [fash-iz-uhm] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation

–noun

1.	(sometimes initial capital letter) a governmental system led by a dictator having complete power, forcibly suppressing opposition and criticism, regimenting all industry, commerce, etc., and emphasizing an aggressive nationalism and often racism.

2.	(sometimes initial capital letter) the philosophy, principles, or methods of fascism.

3.	(initial capital letter) a fascist movement, esp. the one established by Mussolini in Italy 1922–43.

[Origin: 1915–20; <>fascismo, equiv. to fasc(io) bundle, political group (see fasces) + -ismo -ism]

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

American Heritage Dictionary - Cite This Source fas·cism (fāsh'ĭz'əm) Pronunciation Key
n.

often Fascism

A system of government marked by centralization of authority under a dictator, stringent socioeconomic controls, suppression of the opposition through terror and censorship, and typically a policy of belligerent nationalism and racism.
A political philosophy or movement based on or advocating such a system of government.

Oppressive, dictatorial control

Who does that remind you of? How about his buddy, and top lietenant? Hmm, can't wait to open mail today. Other famous fascists...

Bush is a Dirty SOB, So is Angelina

2007-01-07T16:59:00.000-05:00

Surge, surge, surge? Are you kidding me? Are we back in Viet Nam? Talk about a flat-out, dirty fucking SOB. I already know that son of a bitch is going to roast in hell, but now he's just bent on killing innocent boys andgirls to prove that he's right. I'm praying for a massive coronary.

On top of that, I hope those SOBs who just got elected have enough balls to stand up for themselves and cut the money off.

BTW, pet peave outside the district of corruption: Angelina Jolie. You're efforts to look peaceful and caring with all the children of the world is a little much. We all know that you're a home wrecker. Just own it and go away.

Amen.

2006-12-21T08:47:00.000-05:00

The Christmas Tree

Now this is funny. Watch this guy get "decorated."

Santa's Been a Bad, Bad Boy

2006-12-19T11:25:00.000-05:00

See what's in Santa's Pants at http://fuse.tv/santa/pants/index.php. Hat tip to Ad Rants.

2006-12-15T09:11:00.000-05:00

EviroSanta!

Now this is inventive corruption of the Santa Claus myth. Check this out, Santa's pimping for the environment. Santa's such a liberal ho.

2006-12-14T11:02:00.000-05:00

Charlie Brown Xmas Alternate Ending

OK, this is good. And I do love the exposure of the Santa Claus myth. It's the atheist's Charlie Brown!

2006-12-13T10:57:00.000-05:00

Target Santa Ad

Shame on Target, I mean how cheesy is this? God help us all.

Santa's Smoking What?

2006-12-12T16:09:00.000-05:00

Of course. Because before Tom Brokaw got out of his diapers, Santa was pushing big tobacco. Friendly little elfy guy, huh?

If there's anything more corrupt than Santa (outside of a politician), I'd like to know about it. Cuz the way I see it, Santa's a ho. Ho, ho, ho.

2006-12-12T00:07:00.000-05:00

Twisted Satanic Santa Ad

And this is supposed to sell? The prostitution of Santa downward spirals into new levels of bizarre, twistedness.

That's Right,Santa's Corrupt.

2006-12-11T18:55:00.000-05:00

Have a Coke and a corrupt Santa. Heh, heh, heh. Watch over the ensuing days as we show corporate America corrupting old St. Nick.

Hugo's My Boy!

2006-12-03T14:32:00.000-05:00

Yeah, anyone aligned with Iran belongs on this page. I love Hugo! The man who said, "This is not a dictatorship, it's a democracy."

OK. And Luke didn't get it on with his sister Leia. Right.

Well, at least will have some colorful headlines and unique media stories for another six years. Hugo's not going anywhere. Keep supporting Citgo, gang.

Cheney Trip: Iraq or Oil?

2006-11-25T10:16:00.000-05:00

They say it's to quell the war, to restore "political balance" to the growing nightmare called Iraq. But why meet in Saudia Arabia?

Is this really about the war, or is it about the oil? Hmmm. Yeah, I'd consider the negotiator and the place. We all know Cheney is corrupt. Saudia Arabia is as corrupt as you could imagine.

Of course local PR Firm Qorvis and its owner Doug Poretz would try to tell you differently. But consider the source. Any Jew who represents the Saudis should be ashamed of himself (that would be you, Doug), throw in that he's paid to pimp the Saudis, and how credible is that? Yes, Doug is a great and fitting member of the District of Corruption.

The dark side works in deep pervasive ways. It's everywhere.

The Dark Side of Fox: OJ Simpson

2006-11-16T23:46:00.001-05:00

How pathetic is this? Please, OJ Simpson confessing. What is wrong with this guy? What an absolute egomaniac, confessing in front of 30 million people. No wonder he did so well in Hollywood.

Perhaps, OJ would have done well here in DC, otherwise known as the Hollywood for ugly people. Where else could Dick Cheney become famous?

Even better is Fox's blatant tabloid exploitation of our puritanically repressed society. Great move, Rupert: Show us what whores we really are. Another victory for the dark side.

Oh yeah, way to go on the Dems on sacrificing Nancy to the wolves. The Dems have already demonstrated that corruption knows only one particular political party.

I have a new apprentice. Where there's one, there's always another. Look for my fellow Sith Lord to join the District soon.

Auto Corruption with Bush

2006-11-14T23:48:00.000-05:00

Now if this isn't corruption, what is? Seriously, the big three and the man, that's right -- me, getting together on how to better exploit Asia. Of course if they keep financing our ridiculous national debt I may have to turn a blind eye.

What's even funnier is that in addition to Chrysler, GM and Ford chairs, you have his holiness, the Cardinal of Detroit there, too. Any little boys in attendance? How sad is this photo.

What a joke. As if Bush actually has any power left.

I Hate the Redskins

2006-11-12T15:30:00.000-05:00

Yeah, that's right. I frickin' hate them. In fact, I was thrilled to see them losing today when I checked the score in the third quarter.

Why? Is it because I like Dallas? No, I hate them because of that corrupt bloke, corporate egomaniac known as Danny Snyder. Consider who he hangs out with? Tom Cruise? If that's not enough to make you puke, I'm not sure what is.

Never mind that the guy is milking DC fans for every frickin' sent in their wallet. A dark side plague on the Skins. May they never win another Super Bowl until Danny boy sells them to someone more concerned about civic welfare.

Bye-Bye Rummie

2006-11-08T13:51:00.000-05:00

And another one has fallen. Au revoir Mac Rumdu!

It is as I have forseen it. It's your destiny. More to fall soon.

Election Results: The Republic is Safe

2006-11-08T07:52:00.000-05:00

Order 66 has been carried out and while there are still a couple of jedi, I meant Senators, who are eluding our grasp, control of Congress is almost completed. The jthreat to the Republic has been almost eliminated, though there are still many in the district of ocrruption throughout the parties.

Of course there are always whiners that can't take a loss. If you were better masters at the dark side and less moronic, perhaps we could have kept you in power. But corruption requires deftness, and this group of fools doesn't have it.

See my girlfriend, Wonkette for full election results.

New minions are to be found. There's always some innocent young politician to corrupt! It's inevitable really.

And by the way, CNN doesn't get it. Talk about stupid. A blogger party. Yes, we're all geeks who can't handle our booze, exciting TV, huh? Uh, no.

Order 66: Tuesday, Bloody, Tuesday

2006-11-07T09:21:00.000-05:00

Yes, it’s finally upon us, Tuesday, Bloody, Tuesday! To my legion of warriors, execute order 66!

My minions have been working hard! The end of the Republican revolution, and the restoration of democracy. Heh, heh, heh. The good guys wear white, right?

Remember, corruption knows no race, gender, sexual preference, party or faith. It’s a human condition. It’s our destiny, unfortunately (oops, slipping out of character, back to being evil). I meant, “It’s our destiny! Heh, heh, heh!”

2006-11-05T23:14:00.000-05:00

Ted Haggard Bashing Gays - from JESUS CAMP the Movie

Oops. Another corrupt one bites the dust. See you later, Haggard.

Throw Down the Fascists

2006-11-05T18:10:00.000-05:00

Yes, the fascists are in trouble. Absolutism, redistricting, the painting of liberals as evil, the painting of all muslims as evil. Is fascism too strong of a word? Maybe the press can’t say this, the Jedi ways of the force are weak! But a Sith Lord can speak his mind on fascism.

Fascism: Governmental system led by a dictator having complete power, forcibly suppressing opposition and criticism, regimenting all industry, commerce, etc., and emphasizing an aggressive nationalism and often racism.

Thanks, Dictionary.com.

Yes, I feel your anger, America. It gives you focus, makes you stronger. Strike down your representatives, and take their places. A new era of corruption is upon us.

Corruption Knows No Boundaries

2006-11-03T08:12:00.000-05:00

See what happens? The dark side is stronger than good, reaching across oceans to corrupt. Even Taiwanese elite, the first lady, is guilty of embezzlement.

Post-ed writer EugeneRobinson asks how low will I go? Calling democrats terorrists. No problem. The dark side knows no depths of corruption, it is all powerful. Young jedi, you have much to learn.

Yes politics, it's a corrupt business. Elections even get young, beautiful Norwegian women all excited. It's a rough business. You'll see on Tuesday when jobs are lost.

Speaking of corruption, check out how the advertising world exploits young women, noted by a District Ad Man. Heh, heh, heh. Thanks to DCBlogs for the local corruption action.

The Corrupt Come Out to Play, WaPost Allen Article

2006-11-01T08:12:00.000-05:00

Yes, I've exited my death star to go rally the troops. Nevermind what people will say, the donkey, the elephant, the dark side will win again! Heh, heh, heh.

Kerry's comments on kids staying in school to avoid the war raised the ire of my lighter half, George W. Well it was a sensationalist comment in a non-draft era made by an idiot politician that couldn't beat the corrupt, but hey, if I was a kid, I'd be scared of going to war, too. Hmm, PhD here I come.

Buried deep in today's Post is the Allen staffers/thugs beating of the young liberal at one of his events. The Post has done a horrible job covering this, originally calling the man a lunatic. If anyone hasn't seen the video look below. Certainly, a revealing look at the character of Allen's men. It's one thing to restrain a man, another to throw him to the ground.

These thugs match the Senator's character. I like them, they are followers of the dark side.

2006-10-31T22:42:00.000-05:00

Allen Supporters Busted Beating Liberal

Ooops. George Allen supporters beat a liberal at a Republican rally. Perhaps a little tar and feathers for the good ole boys from down south would have been more suiting.

Nothing like getting busted on TV beating liberals. Thanks to Boing Boing for the video pointer via Wonkette. Another interesting view is Raising Kaine, a VA progressive blog.

While I appreciate the undying support of my Empire's doctrine by Allen, this should be the death knell of his campaign. Perhaps he should have stuck to his daddy's profession, Redskins football. Hmm, they need a coach now come to think of it.

What better man to replace him than the former Secretary of Navy from my Daddy's old boss Ronald Reagan's regime. Jim Webb and I go way back. We used to womanize together. Heh, heh, just kidding. Maybe.

Wilson Bridge Project Absolved

2006-10-30T08:44:00.000-05:00

Yes, my friends. Time to get more local, it's onto the Wilson Bridge project. Yes, the triumph of interstate cooperation, a magnificent accomplishment unless you were one of the 160 owners of homes flooded by evil minions at the Bridge Construction project. My bridge has been absolved of guilt in the flooding supposedly caused by the Woodrow Wilson Bridge.

Of course, we are in the midst of denial and deflection. It always helps when you conduct an "independent study" about work executed by yourself. Nevermind that you are the government body that actually is constructing the bridge in question.

Here's to Virginia DoT Secretary Pierce Homer. Nevermind the poor, stomp on them, flood them out!!!! A true master of evil. The Dark Side Always Wins!

Ann Coulter: Lesbian Extraordinaire

2006-10-29T18:03:00.000-05:00

After this ridiculous Rush incident, I’ve decided to out and get rid of all the rubbish serving the Dark Side. Starting with Ann Coulter, who I might add is a lesbian. That’s right, outed.

C’mon, you knew this. Why else would someone be so vehemently anti-gay, anti-lesbian, unless they were hiding their own homosexuality? Yes, Ann is just an old-fashioned, rough rug-muncher, pardon my evilness. She’s so angry, too, I just love it.

But alas, in the post Republican revolution, she is worthless to me. So it’s time to find a new princess to carry the sword of the dark side. Hmmm, whom could that be? Ha, ha, ha, ha! Am I evil? Yes I am!

Look for more head-chopping on November 7. I’ve had enough. Out with the old corrupt, and in with new. What better example than the possible loss of good ole boy, George Allen, to be replaced by Jim Webb. Yes, Corruption Is Abound.

Run, Lola, Run

2006-10-26T09:24:00.001-04:00

The gay community's High Heels Race in DC occured on Tuesday night. I would like to tell you it's a fact that gay marriage should be illegal, but the District of Corruption is a parody of those that are corrupt, and the gay community is not corrupt. While the Gay Canuck entry rants about straight people lauding the race, Darth Bush says kudos. Progress not perfection.

Right, back to evil corruption. The Michael J. Fox controversy has disturbed idiot stormtrooper Rush Limbaugh. What a moron? How can you possibly attack Mr. Family Ties? I mena watch this thing. Michale J. Fox has fricking Parkinsons! It's like saying Stevie Wonder really isn't blind when he shakes his head while playing keyboard.

It's obvious stormtrooper Limbaugh has had a relapse on pain meds... or something. The problem with the Dark Side is that sometimes your minions are too dumb for their own good. We will have to initiate order 75290 and have Mr. drug-addict Limbaugh executed. It's too bad, but the war must continue, we will change strategy, but stay the course!

Haliburton Strikes Again

2006-10-25T09:20:00.000-04:00

Yes, Haliburton strikes again, sucking the lifeblood out of the American public. Fifty five percent of a $300 million contract goes to “administrative” work. Ha, ha! Yes, mighty nice golf courses here in the District of Corruption!

It’s a true testament to the power of the dark side that Haliburton continues to get contracts. Of course it always helps when the vice president of the United States used to be your Chairman and CEO. Way to go, Cheney! I may have to pass on that hunting trip, but you still have a place close to my heart.

The World Series? Corrupted.

2006-10-23T23:00:00.000-04:00

I have sent my special emissary from my former major league baseball team the Texas Rangers, Kenny Rogers to corrupt the World Series. As you can see the pine tar (or worse) on his hand to the left is from the American League Championship Series, and the right is the World Series. No one would have noticed, but my old ally and now sudden enemy Fox News outed Rogers during the broadcast last night.

It doesn't matter, we will not quit the war on integrity. And the National past time is an ideal sport to corrupt. Oops, too late; steroids, Pete Rose, Shoeless Joe Jackson, Barry Bonds. They should bat with red lightsabers.

Parking Plan Foiled!

2006-10-21T23:23:00.000-04:00

Welcome back, my pupil. Come to learn more about the dark side? The District of Corruption holds many minions. Some are obvious, some are not. By now you must know that they can never be turned from the Dark Side.

Not all are national politicians. Yes, there are the local politicians, too. The laughable Washington Nationals parking lot debacle, representing the destruction of baseball fans joy, the crippling of Mayor Williams dream, and the first of many ineffective moves by Adrian Fenty. Weakness. The council’s short sightedness, is it a matter of principal or just corruption? As you can see, my young apprentice, your friends have failed.

Nothing can stop the dark side and its minions on the DC council. Linda, ah yes, Linda.

And of course the master of corruption himself, Darth Barry. Who could show such open deception for so long, yet remain in power? Only a Sith Lord. Heh, heh. Crack conviction, no problem. Tax evasion may be bad for Al Capone, but for Lord Barry, hell, no problem. Drinking and driving? Forget about it. That’s the power of the dark side!

Heck, not even all of them are politicos. Yes, we are in business, too.

More shall be revealed, my young apprentice. But do not worry, the mission is not complete, and no matter the pressure, we will not yield. We won’t pull out until the job is done, until all of America is corrupt.

Sex Sith Successfully Deflects

2006-10-19T11:15:00.000-04:00

See, the mastery of the dark side impressive. Look how Foley has turned the Page scandal into a Catholic church child molestation issue. Now the church is on the defensive. Still, Foley is no longer of any value to the dark side. We must find a new pupil.

Sex Siths

2006-10-18T21:52:00.000-04:00

There are many of us in the District of Corruption. Some you know, many you don’t, some who you think are corrupt are not, and others who would be innocent, are masters of the Dark Side. They know the power the force offers them, and use it for their own ends.

Here’s a queen of the Dark Side, the Washingtonienne, Jessica Cutler. A true sith lordess, god bless her. Look how she corrupted the Hill and shined light on our naughty, naughty Senators! Ha! I love it. Her blog image below says it all! Sex is dark, a matter for the Sith.

Of course there’s one of my latest Sith pupils to fall, Mark Foley. Ahhh, it’s too bad he had to let his appetite force me to out him and end his apprenticeship! Still you can see his mastery of the dark side, look how he deflects his own abuse of House Pages by shifting blame to the Catholic Church. What a strong one.

Yes, the dark side is abound. There are more of us every day. Blue states, red light sabers. You, too, will join us.

Another Victory for the Dark Side

2006-10-17T23:22:00.000-04:00

Kenneth Lay's fortunes are to be kept by his children thanks to our fine members in Congress who failed to engage in legal action that would stop the dark side from winning. Big energy wins again. The rebellion is crushed once more.

DC: Home of the Corrupt

2006-10-17T15:18:00.000-04:00

Yes, a blog, a rant about the District. Washington, DC and its outlying MD and VA suburbs. The land of the corrupt. Where else could a man like Dick Cheney become powerful?

I am Darth Bush, and I am a Sith Lord. And you're God damn right, I am evil. In fact, I am the Axis of Evil, but because I am a master of misdirection, you think the Axis consists of North Korea, Iraq and Iran. Feel the power of the dark side.

I am not alone. There are many of us. You think of us as Donkeys, as Elephants, as government contractors, as lobbyists, the PR people, the journalists. Perhaps. Really, we're just the Corrupt. And we live in the District (or in Bethesda or Great Falls).

Come back. I know you will. It's your destiny.